Alice approached Dragon and forcefully said, “Take a seat.”
Dragon was surprised by Alice’s boldness, so he thought he’d sit down and see what happened next.
“We can’t make you keep your promises,” said George, no longer sounding like a timorous employee. “We can’t MAKE you do anything; you’re too powerful for that. But it seems to us that you’re more concerned about money than you are about staying alive.”
“Kill yourself if you like,’ said Alice, picking up the theme, “But it isn’t fair of you to kill us too. So we’re begging you to listen.”
Dragon was impressed. There was something admirable about these puny humans and their willingness to stand up to him. This, in turn, prompted him to think about their pretty little planet and what a pity it would be to destroy it.
George drove home the point: “So if you care about saving us and saving yourself as a bonus, you’re going to have to admit you’ve got a problem.”
“You’ve got to accept you’re addicted to SPAM.” Added Alice bluntly.
“SPAM!!!?” Exclaimed Dragon, affronted by such an outlandish accusation. “You’re suggesting I’m addicted to that dreadful Spiced Ham? Are you mad? Can’t stand the stuff I’ll have you know. I only ever eat the very finest cuts of corn-fed Kobi beef!”
“No – not Spam.” Corrected Alice: “S.P.A.M.!”
“Status, Power and Money!” Explained George slowly. You’re addicted to Status, Power and Money!”
And, just then, a tiny miracle occurred. For a split second, Dragon caught a glimpse of himself as others saw him, and this was a profoundly depressing image.
